Wednesday, December 31, 2008
I have done my realtime accounting! congrats! On my way home I reflected a bit...
I have something to confess.. I feel very unhappy when my friends acheive better results than me. Supposedly, I should feel happy for them but often I find myself comparing although I know I should not. Its one of my weaknesses. I wish I could really put aside the competitive side and do my best. But there is a saying, "no competition no improvment". Its true I guess. Sorry friends if my competitiveness make you feel ...I really don't know how to describe that feeling. Just that I want to apologise...
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SZeGEk out
@ |2:21 PM|
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
tomorrow is new year eve! Just now I watched the channel 8 news and it mentioned about the white balls floating around the marina bay area. Wishes of many people were written on these balls, no doubt I wrote my wishes on three of these balls! hope my wishes will come true=D
Update on xiao T.. Today alicia chose a golden seat which enable me to have a perfect view of him during the break time. Thanks a lot!! The more i see him the harder for me to give up. how? next tuesday euthanasia dicussion cafe and my class people have not really started and our group might be ready for next week,which means....WE START FIRST! it isn't fair at all. Just because we done it doesn't mean that we are ready. The world is never fair and I believe so because I have a lot of examples to quote.xiao T, I really hope you are the one~~ 1 more day to 2009=D A fresh new year ahead!
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SZeGEk out
@ |9:35 PM|
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Today went up with karin xueli mei fang and mei fen. We chatted a lot! They updated me on certain stuffs. In conclusion, I had a really fun time today catching up with one another=)
I suddenly miss those times when we girls fight as a team , the BS netball team spirit!! I really love you girls!!=D Hope we'll get a chance to play as a team again..the bonding among us is so strong that we could communicate without even talking. Wonder how we really do it at that time. Such good chemistry!! Its really so miracle^^
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SZeGEk out
@ |9:03 PM|
Friday, December 26, 2008
I never realised that actually I have posted so much posts!! That means I am hardworking=D
Recently I don't feel like going out maybe its because of recession which make me think twice before spending on entertainment and stuffs like that. I have a sudden urge to speak in english=D So alicia and zixin we'll start our speak english campaign again when school starts ok? =) Its kinda wierd when I dreaded to do my econs but began to like it when I really start doing it and reading and understanding the notes. I sort of finish reading ya qing's book as i skipped a whole lot of pages... quite boring~ ( no offense ) XD
My thinking changed too much this holiday but I guess its part of growing up^^ trying to be optimistic but I find it hard to be sociable actually because of the transparent barrier everyone has to protect himself or herself.
Need to be prepared for euthanasia!! no need to compete with you all we just do our best its sufficient. Pray that we'll do well^^
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SZeGEk out
@ |6:06 PM|
I am so bogged down by the whole euthanasia thing. I think I am going crazy. I really cannot imagine when term starts how fast will the pace be. When I refer back to my economics I couldn't believe that I have forgotten so much. I stared blannkly at the question of my tutorial and the notes. Maybe its because partly I am very tired and sleepy so I cannot concentrate. I am beginning to feel the stress now. My com is spoilt so that means I have to print my stuffs in school. So sickening!! Like right now I am so tired again. I should revise my econs all over again!
After analyzing with zixin last night I think I am prepared to give up^^ huhu~~
I am looking foward to<<>>=D
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SZeGEk out
@ |12:18 PM|
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Seriously I am struggling with my economics again T.T Perhaps I should leave it till later. I think I will read the storybook that i borrowed from ya ching. I feel really so sleepy and tired all of a sudden..could it be due to...
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SZeGEk out
@ |8:37 PM|
HOHOHO!! merry merry christmas! Though I never celebrate this year but next year I hope to celebrate with my friends! A few more days to new year 2009! Its countdown time again! Just now i went to the post office to post a wrongly mailed letter. On my way, I met my secondary classmate, Lee ping!! I didn't notice her initially then she called me, I was so elated and surprised! It sort of brighten up my morning^^
Now everything that i thought of seems to be true, like xiao T and I belongs to two different world and its never possible that he'll take a liking on me. So? STOP DREAMING GIRL! BE REALISTIC^^ luckily I have a great bunch of friends!^^ CHEERS! Santa claus is coming to town~~lalalala
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SZeGEk out
@ |12:55 PM|
Monday, December 22, 2008
What my birthday mean??
01/12/1991
You are very curious and dedicative. When you are interested in something, everything else has to wait. This is your quality. But if you learn to be more patient and complete what you have started, you will be successful in life. Your Love, You believe in love at first sight. You won't wait to learn more about the person. Vise versa, people who fail to impress you will hardly get a chance to be your friend. Your emotion is on the extreme. You can only love or hate, nothing in between and this often shows in your expression. Try not to end a relationship in a quarrel.
Hmm quite true^^ do you agree alicia?? LOL
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SZeGEk out
@ |6:31 PM|
Sunday, December 21, 2008
I just rebonded my hair today and i look really stupid i swear.To be optimistic, I got a new look=D I still miss my little sweet cousin!! I have been going through his photos again and again.
Zixin wearing contact so among the three of us i look the stupiest and "most nerd". Sadded.
After reading alicia's blog, actually I have been doing a lot of reflection too. Like how did I treat people and how people treat me,a lot to reflect about. Instead of thinking of xiao T I think I should focus on how to to get a good GPA, how to maintain strong friendship with my buddies, and planning on my new year resolution etc...
After reflecting so much, seriously I feel that I am not good enough for xiao T,so I will pray silently for him hoping he'll find his happiness. I won't want to force people.It is often easier said than done and I often find myself in tears after all the struggle that's going through in my mind. It is hard to give up someone/something you really like but if that will bring happiness to more people why not take a step back and try to give up?
Its not as if it is the first time I am giving up someone and something i like. I admit it is not at all easy. I always ended in a complete breakdown state but after that life still goes on. Maybe I will grow stronger mentally? As of now I just have this to say....
If we were meant to be from the start, I believe we will end up together someday because...the earth is round!=D
I am trying harder to become a optismistic person so that my heart won't be so heavy (packed with so many problems)
Everyday is a fresh new day! what happened yesterday is past, what will happen today is the most important=D cheers!
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SZeGEk out
@ |3:29 PM|
Saturday, December 20, 2008
I miss xiang xiang! my dear baby cousin!! How are you doing?? Hahaa
An ordinary day... I am so reluctant to get on with the euthanasia issue... sighs!
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SZeGEk out
@ |4:13 PM|
Thursday, December 18, 2008
I miss my little sweetie cousin!! He is really a sweet little cute toodler!! I enjoy playing with him,interacting him. He is really hyper LOL and even though he looked so tired he will still keep on playing. Its hard to get him to sleep.. Have to humour him, let him listen to songs and..... then finally he will fall asleep. He always wake up at 6 plus in the morning!! SO EARLY!! I was still in my dreams most of the time,lols. I took lots of photos of him! hahaha
congrats to alicia and zixin who got into the committee for mentoring~~
Maybe What I am most afraid of may come true looking at how things goes now... If I really ended up ....... I think its the time of secondary school nightmare again.. If it all meant to happen like that then I will accept it... I think somethings is better left unsaid unexplained..
I hope I could keep everything to myself so I won't bother people around me anymore... I am such a nuisance and bother!!
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SZeGEk out
@ |6:10 PM|
Sunday, December 14, 2008
I will be going to malaysia for the next four days^^ Enjoy your holiday everyone! cheers! LOLS
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SZeGEk out
@ |4:06 PM|
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Super big Thanks to
Jingho and
wei liang...They gave me a super big winnie the pooh...
one of my wishes come true^^ thanks a lot once a again!! free delivery somemore! LOLs...
I spent whole of today packing my stuff and cleaning my house and playing online games...
I am looking forward to gOing malaysia!! here i come my dear baby cousin^^
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SZeGEk out
@ |10:06 PM|
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Xueli and me sent jasmine to the airport today^^ We took lots of photos!!=)
hey guess what? xiao t is online again.... but I think its my turn to be cool this time...
I reflected just a while ago.. I won't want to force things,I just want him to be happy its enough for now..Suddenly I have this thinking..hmm maybe as time passes I will change my thinking again... Anyway I enjoy xueli's company^^ so tomorrow still going out with alicia and zixin??
its wierd,if he online they nt online,they online he not online... how to consult?? LOLs ok i shall not do anything!!!!=P
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SZeGEk out
@ |8:50 PM|
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Today I went to catch a movie at the cathay! I woke up quite early and i went to play badminton with my sister till around 11 plus.Then i received xueli's call..."we change the time to 11.30 you know?" I was stunned! LOL because its 15min to 11.30 and I had not even bath yet. Luckily they change to 12.00pm^^ Thanks~~ I must say the movie was indeed nice and the plot was unpredictable^^ The cinema was not even 1/3 filled! Lol we had the whole row of seats to ourselves.Cool! After the movie we just walked around plaza sing.... Anyway jasmine is flying to hk tmr...Me and xueli is going to the airport to send her^^ Hope we'll have a fun time tmr!!
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SZeGEk out
@ |4:56 PM|
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Have i been hooked to blogging? Is it a good thing?? Actually initially I thought blogging could be one form of medium for me to express myself and well hopefully for me to practise more english^^ Its early 8.23am!! Our meeting for crs is cancelled and we'll do everything at home,hopefully we can finish everything within this week...*pray hard* everyone is busy this holiday!
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SZeGEk out
@ |8:21 AM|
Monday, December 8, 2008
If I had a chance I rather I don't notice him at all at all so i won't change that much,I find that I had neglected my friends all my friends!!!! sorry girls if I really ignore your presence or even let you feel that you are no longer needed in my life but in actual fact You all are still the best in my heart and i really mean it, i find it harder to express myself already...Started to think a lot reflect a lot... Have i change for the better or worst? what should I do?? Maybe that's what growing up is... maybe I have been influence too much by my poly friends?? I dunno.. I hope my friends won't just drift away from me... i was trying to change for the better but have I change for the worst instead?? sorry~~~
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SZeGEk out
@ |9:08 PM|
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Hey is it consider lucky or not?
Today I went to city hall to celebrate my friend's birthday and we have a really great time...
Shall upload the photos when i have the time..
Guess what happen just Now??
xiao T online... And i went to have a short chat with him...
Okay, its cold conversation,maybe he's busy watching his show that's y.. I threw a coin to decide whether to end the conversation and leave him alone..In the end I end the conversation and sign out of msn and blog here now...am i foolish? I guess not! i leaving all to fate that's all..I am already very contented that i chatted with him for a few minutes and its all general questions.... Hope there will be another chance for me...^^ i am looking forward to it!! Lols... At least I did try isn't it?? Now i can confirm that all along he wasn't mean to ............ my friends got it all wrong and misinterpret his behaviour... Now i kNow,at least we are considered friends isn't it? I am contented for now^^ my wish upon the wishing well come true?? lets wait... I am truly contented,really~~~ next time i hope i have the courage to say hi^^
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SZeGEk out
@ |11:16 PM|
Saturday, December 6, 2008
I don't want to go friendster I will end up with just more disappointment that's all~
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SZeGEk out
@ |9:42 PM|
Its saturday! I went shopping with my mum and sis^^
It was a fruitful shopping i can say... I got everything i wanted...
Last night I have the sweetest dream ever,of course it has to do with....erhem...
I won't spell out the details here but anyway i really hope this dream will come true...
Okay monday I will be doing CRS project,again euthanasia problem... there will be internal conflict i guess... hope everything can be completed fast^^
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SZeGEk out
@ |5:51 PM|
Friday, December 5, 2008
Now we have a big issue!!Euthanasia!!!!!!
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SZeGEk out
@ |6:08 PM|
Its a good day to end the semester^^ I saw xiao T in the mrt,his class occupy a row of seats..Hmm what does it mean?? Then when we reached school, I saw him again and I'll never forget what he did=) And after school he was queuing up at the muslim stall and zixin and alicia started asking me to go and queue up too..=.=" Sometimes I really don't know what his behaviour meant... maybe i interpret it all wrongly... After the mst we went bugis and in the end we bought nothing except zixin who bought a massager for her mum(so fillial) Lols.. While shopping at bugis the two girls kept saying xiao T here and there=.="" Its too early to say anything because we are still no more than stranger... At bugis we saw W, I am so angry he never acknowlege ...what the!!! I hope my buddy won't think so much and look forward to xiao C... =) cheer up my dear buddy^^
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SZeGEk out
@ |5:39 PM|
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
It's funny when you find yourself
Looking from the outside
I'm standing here but all I want
Is to be over there
Why did I let myself believeMiracles could happenCause now I have to pretendThat I don't really careI thought you were my fairytaleA dream when I'm not sleepingA wish upon a starIt's coming trueBut everybody else could tell
That I confused my feelings with the truth
When there was me and you
I swore I knew the melody
That I heard you singing
And when you smiled
You made me feel
Like I could sing along
But then you went and changed the words
Now my heart is empty
I'm only left with used-to-be's
And once upon a song
Now I know your not a fairytaleAnd dreams were meant for sleepingAnd wishes on a starJust don't come trueCause now even I can tell
That I confused my feelings with the truth
Cause I liked the view
When there was me and you
I can't believe thatI could be so blind
It's like you were floating
While I was falling
And I didn't mind
***
Cause I liked the view
***
I thought you felt it too
When there was me and you
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SZeGEk out
@ |5:39 PM|
ALICIA AND ZIXIN ARE THE BEST BUDDIES!=)
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SZeGEk out
@ |3:16 PM|
for today...stats is challenging.....
As regarding 1st dec:
What the!!! I super disappointed.... Okay since its like that then I won't care also anymore...what a birthday?!!! mst first day and damn disappointed day... thanks zixin and xinyan for the presents^^ I am so happy that I have same birthday as alicia!!! hahaha
so many people remembered my birthday^^ they rocks
A big thanks to: Xueli,Sameenah,Leo,mei fang,Jiahui,Hong ling, Suping,Fabian,Karin,Jingho,Shimin,Suba, choon sze,especially
alicia,wei liang,jesslyn,my cousin(louise),mei fen,jacyln,ronald,peihua,yong liang,jasmine,lynette,miss maler,zixin,xinyan,zhi neng,rasyidah,last but not least my dear family!!!=D
too bad someone's name is missing~~~ but I guess I won't ever care so much already... really very disappointing okay....=(
~~if i have the second chance to choose, i rather i never noticed you~~
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SZeGEk out
@ |12:41 PM|
